“I Shouldn’t Have Come!”: Tales of Worst Date Experiences
Take a few seconds to picture yourself getting ready for a date with that special someone, only to end up with an experience that can only be described as abysmal. A lot of people probably have their own hilarious and embarrassing tales to tell about their worst dating experiences. We’ve compiled stories from members of the Reddit community revealing their least favorite dating experience.
1. A Complete Jerk
Dinner seemed to go all right, except that he drank most of a shared pitcher of margaritas by himself, then drank all the liquor I had at home. I was kind of irked, so we went searching for more.
The first place was closing up (it's Sunday), so he goes up and bangs on the windows, loudly demanding that they sell us some beer and calling them jerks while I die of embarrassment.
At the next place, after they served us, he casually said, "Oh yeah, I don't have any money, so you're going to have to get that." Not that I expected him to pay for my beer, but he expected me to pay for his.
In conversation, he mentioned that his favorite book was Ulysses and compared himself to Jack Kerouac. I asked him what kind of movies he liked, only for him to snotily retort that he watches "films."
He had me read a short story he wrote that, frankly, was pretty terrible, but when I offered polite criticism, he got angry and said I just didn't understand. That was the problem with being a "natural writer," he said. No one understands.
At one point during the evening he wanted to check on his dog. He said it wasn't far, but it turned out to be a long drive to the middle of nowhere. Nothing was open, and I had to pee really bad. It was the most resentful roadside pee imaginable.
After he snapped at me about not understanding his writing, I said I was tired and he should go. He asked me for $3.00 for gas. I wanted him gone so much I actually gave it to him. Then I deleted his number.
2. Great Pretender
So I met this guy, friend of friends, at a pub. It was pretty loud and we were pretty drunk, and he said something about his dad being in hospital - I got the impression that his dad had died.
Cut to a few days later and he asks me to go for dinner with him. At one point during the meal he says "I was going to go and see my dad next week, I wondered if you wanted to come with me."
I go "Yeah sure! Haha, oh man, I thought your dad was dead! Hahaha!" and proceed to ask if he looks like his dad, what his dad is like etc etc. We continue with the meal but he looks a bit sheepish, clams up a bit.
A few days later I discover his dad is dead, but he is such a nice guy he just pretended for the length of the date that he wasn't so that I wouldn't feel awkward.
3. Unfortunate Events
In high school, we went on a date to see The Prince of Egypt, the Val Kilmer Moses cartoon, because why not.
We were the only two people in the theater for the first ten minutes or so until a class of various middle-school aged kids from a religious school walk in and sit in the row directly behind us for some reason.
They kicked the back of our seats and threw popcorn at our heads continuously saying "what-are-you-gonna-do-about-it?" There was a teacher but he wasn't saying anything.
Like every responsible adult capable of dealing with their own problems, I told on them to the management of the theater. The usher comes down with a flashlight and asks them to behave or leave, they choose to leave, screaming that we were intolerant and were picking on them.
Then she puked popcorn in my car on the way home.
I didn't know what to do, so I pulled over and waited for her to finish.
Because I turned the car off, she thought I was mad at her for puking, so she started to cry and got out of the car to walk home.
I had to drive slowly on the road with the door open, beckoning her to get back inside the puke filled car.
I probably looked insane.
4. Very Unusual
Worst date ever would have to be one with a guy I had met in our University's library. Right? You'd think that if the guy had the guts and the charm to come over to me while I'm studying and ask me to dinner, he'd be a keeper. Nope. At least not in this case.
He told me he'd take me to dinner. Then when he came to pick me up, he said he didn't quite have enough money and maybe we could make dinner back at his place. I am totally fine with this, in fact I think it's a bit romantic. So we start making dinner, drinking wine, all that stuff.
But as soon as we sit down, he's on his computer talking about his Fantasy Football League. Now, I have no problems with that but there is a time and place for everything. Then, he calls up some of his mates and talks for a good 20 minutes about who he should pick and a lot of football jargon that I do not quite understand. (Sorry, never been a big fan of football).
All while I'm sitting there just idling time by myself, quietly eating. Then he gets off his computer and has finished his food when he asks me if, since he did the cooking (though we both did) could I do the dishes?
Alright this slightly annoys me but I can understand why he'd want me to help out. I'm not trying to be a brat on the first date. I find the sink already absolutely full of dishes and start on the ones that we used. I finished with just the plates that we used because I figured that's what he meant.
So as I start to dry my hands he asks me why I haven't done the rest of them.
I, now thoroughly tick off and annoyed, do ALL the rest of the dishes by hand (no dishwasher) and ask him to take me home. Once we get back to my place he asks if he can come in for a bit, I politely say no, and he gets furious, kicking me out of the car and drives away.
Needless to say, I didn't call him again. Now I'm fine doing the dishes and helping out and all of that stuff! That's not a big problem but ignoring me as we eat dinner and then asking me to do the dishes on the FIRST date is a bit much I think.